Dating : I Can’t Read Romantic Cues, Please Help Decipher
I have never been stellar at reading the signs of romantic interest. I’m either too cautious and don’t trust/miss them (didn’t know for sure if my ex was into me until he kissed me) or read too deeply into the standard signs of interest. Every time I feel as though a guy is displaying signs of romantic interest I am proven wrong. I need an opinion that is not from an over-encouraging and biased friend for this one:
I (20f) have known this guy (21m) for nearly a year. We met through involvement in a campus literary magazine at our university for which we are both now part of the head editor team. We talked casually at meetings throughout the year and I would take notice of his tendency to single out my name to say bye to at the end of meetings (very insignificant I know). I wanted to become friends with him but just never got around to it, my introversion not being a great help here.
I had been meaning to reach out to hang this summer since we’d both be in the area, once again procrastinating. So when he messaged me to wish me a happy birthday, I swooped on the chance to make a friend and vaguely suggested we hang sometime. He immediately asked if I’d want to get lunch that weekend during the time he’s not working, always messaging with exclamation points and smiley faces, and I gladly accepted.
So we went to a super cute cafe and were talking pretty much non stop for the entire three hours he had available before his shift. Enthusiastic discussions, lots of eye contact, he leaned towards me often, and I made him laugh so much more than I usually do when I am establishing connections with people (I was laughing a bunch as well). He ended up paying for the meal and denied my offer to pay for my half. I left with an overwhelming abundance of adrenaline and the prospect of getting getting sushi in the future (him saying he’ll contact me). These all seem like they could be signs of more than friendship, but I’ve been wrong so many times I don’t want to let any feelings loose if this is just supposed to be a fantastic friendship.
Obviously I’m just going to play it cool and see what happens but I want to know if I’m crazy for thinking that this could have the potential to head in a romantic direction.
Do you want to date him? Sounds like you had a date to me. Use polite but clear language that you want to date, and see how he reacts.
If he reaches out to follow up on that sushi offer ask if it’s a date. If he doesn’t follow up yourself and ask about your date. It doesn’t have to be awkward but be open to whatever happens.
Experience or die.