Dating : managing expectations
Hey,
Two weeks ago, I went to dinner with some friends and a friend of mine introduced me to a girl.
After the dinner, the girl sent me a message via Instagram and we started talking.
After two weeks of messages and calls, we decided to have dinner together and go to a walk on the beach.
In my opinion, the date was not so good. I was not flirting too much (I was a little bit nervous),
the weather didn’t help (started raining lol) and I didn’t feel the « click » that we had via WhatsApp.
Also, I think we created a lot of expectations of each other. We talked about traveling together, plans for the future, etc…
After the date, I have noticed that the girl is less communicative (don’t talk too much) and I feel that ghosting or friend zone can happen.
I know that the first impressions are very important, but it was the first date and I don’t wanna give up.
which strategy should I follow?
Should I try to schedule a new date?
Should I send fewer messages for now?
…
I am confused.
Maybe you guys just don’t have that kind of chemistry. That’s ok. But if you don’t want to write it off just yet, wait a day or two from her last « less communicative » response then send a casual but flirtatious message to provoke a response. If she’s ICE COLD maybe move on, but if not then just ask her out again. Nothing too serious. Get coffees and go for a late night drive or something. Depending on the vibe, you might even just confess that things were a bit « off » on date #1 but you think she’s interesting and want to take her out again.
Both of you were prob nervous. I’d say try one more date and if there’s still no chemistry then #friendzone her
Everyone else may feel free to attack me, but Instagram alone is a huge red flag.
Instagram is a hierarchy not a network.
Forget about it.
Next time don’t talk for weeks before the date, you shot yourself in the foot, like you said in your post.