Dating : Overcoming a really unexpected friendzone
A bit of background. I (M22) had a relationship which lasted about 3 years, but ended in a terrible way, being cheated on by my ex. Since that, being pretty young (I was 99), I closed myself into emotional walls, not letting anyone, nor friends, nor other girls inside. I lived so for almost 2 and a half years, until last year.
I’m an Italian university student, when the lockdown hit a colleague (F22) I barely knew started texting me for things related to university. Long story short, even if the last summer we lost a bit of contact we got pretty close, we even met a couple of times (just study related) , but still I was not ready to let anyone in, so I didn’t make a move. But since October things changed, she started texting me every morning with the « good morning », we chatted about anything but university, and for the first time in almost 3 years I fell completely in love. We couldn’t meet because of lockdown, but things became more and more personal, we talked about past relationships, she had a pretty sad background as well (I admit I was not very open about my past), we started exchanging some selfie too and, when possible, we even met a couple of time (not easy, we live 40km apart). I fell completely in love, never felt this way about anyone, and I felt corresponded, and just looking forward for summer to declare myself (I was so scared).
We finished our exams, holidays started, I asked her out again and she told me there is just nothing between us. There was something that was warning me about this outcome, but I thought it was just scars or fears from the past, which I tried to fight, but in the end they revealed to be true. We keep texting, my behaviour towards her has changed, and hers as well, but still friends I guess? Cannot risk too much, after all she is my only studying partner.
So yeah, not much I can do, just trying to get things out in front of strangers. Maybe this will help. As I said, I’m Italian, I did my best to write a decent text, hope it is appreciated, I’m sorry for any mistakes.
Edit: she’s a 9, I’m a 6, kind of had to see that coming ahahahah
If you don’t *want* to be purely platonic friends with her, I would start to put some real distance between you two. For your sake. She’ll be running to you for support when her next boyfriend hurts her feelings. Not worth it, bro.
Dont worry man. I still she thinks so something in you. Maybe not the way you want it, but this good news, just use that momentum to let other people watch your inner light. I bet you would end up with a beautiful girl.