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Dating : To all the ladies…

Dating : To all the ladies…


Does anyone have any experiences with dating multiple people at once? I feel like I’m stuck in this cycle of going on a few dates every few weeks with them going nowhere and being super disappointed.

I have this fear that I’ll just get ghosted after I sleep with the guy, but at this point I’m getting ghosted regardless so I might as well enjoy it and just have multiple people lined up so if I end up catching feelings, I can bounce back quickly and have someone else in the rotation.

Is this a bad idea? I’m 25/F for context. I kind of want to throw the worries out the window and go for it.

What do you think?

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  1. Pretty sure this is what dudes do, and it seems to work well for them. Just make sure you’re treating everyone fairly and you’re not stringing anyone along to satisfy your own needs. And be safe with STIs and all that. And be safe with yourself.

  2. Can confirm not all men date multiple women simultaneously. There are lots of men simply looking for a long term commited (monogamous) relationship.

    If you’re often finding yourself dating men who enjoy dating multiple women, then you might be dating the wrong type of men?

    *Guy who prefers talking / dating one person at a time.*

  3. Yes, dating multiple people is a great idea if it’s for the right reasons. The point of dating besides hopefully finding “someone” is seeing what you like in other people and recognize your boundaries, deal breakers, and maybe even your turn ons. There’s no reason you need to date one person at a time unless it makes you uncomfortable or you’ve agreed to a monogamous relationship. (Although be careful if you’re having sex with multiple people to get a check up more frequently)

    But I would say dating more than one person only to take the pressure of liking someone else off or to avoid getting ghosted is a bad idea. Dating someone to help a relationship with someone else is unfair to the other person and it’s just going to emotionally exhaust you—it’s basically having a relationship with multiple people involved. If you can date them individually and not think of the other ones, you’ll have a much easier time emotionally.

    But yeah, if you are into more than one person, by all means date them.

  4. Dating is supposed to be kind of fun, and right now it doesn’t seem like you’ve been enjoying yourself.

    I say go for it. Have fun, be safe, and dedicate your time to someone when they’ve shown that they’re willing to commit equal time to you.

    Personally, I would neeeever date only one person at a time. It would feel like putting all my eggs in one basket, and I want to know for certain that it’s worth it before I attempt that.

  5. > I have this fear that I’ll just get ghosted after I sleep with the guy, but at this point I’m getting ghosted regardless so I might as well enjoy it

    So you fear being treated badly so youre solution is to just embrace being treated badly? That doesnt make any sense.

    > Is this a bad idea?

    Yes. What are you gonna do when you stop dating person A and decide to go with person B but person B turns out to be a bad person? You just burned that bridge with person A needlessly.

  6. If you’re stuck in a cycle of dating disappointing men every few weeks then it’s your choice in men. Try changing the quality of men you’re dating. Changing the quantity and not the quality will just lead to more rejection.

  7. 23 M here. I immediately cut off those ties with a woman I’m interested in if I know she’s talking to/dating other guys.

    You have to be what you’re looking for, so unless you’re looking for a guy who’s also dating/sleeping around, goodluck. There’s a reason those other guys aren’t dating/sleeping around, they don’t find it appealing with regards to themselves or their prospective partners.

    >I’m getting ghosted regardless so I might as well enjoy it and just have multiple people lined up so if I end up catching feelings, I can bounce back quickly and have someone else in the rotation.

    This tells me you don’t actually *care* about any of these guys you’re seeing, they’re just options to consider. I’ve been ghosted before, the difference being I ask myself « what messages/signs did I miss that could’ve avoided this » and not « Which female is most readily available for me to throw my dong into ».

  8. Attractive guys have no reason to commit. Why would they? Especially if their young. Unless you’re a one of a kind girl, these guys get just as equal or better women.

    And I’m speaking from a guys perspective. If you want a guy to only want you, you gotta be someone special just as us guys have to be someone special to you to commit.

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