Dating : Am I just a fool in love?
Hi there,
Apologies in advance if my words seem a bit jumbled – it is my first time posting a question on any site, let alone Reddit, but I come to you in a bit of a confused mind state.
Back in December 2020, I met a guy from Canada on an online game (I’m from the UK), one thing led to another and we added each other on Discord and sometimes chats became weekly chats, which soon became daily phone calls and ultimately, yet not surprisingly, the feelings really flourished.
To try to describe the situation in few words, 6 months later and I feel as if this person knows me better than most in my own life – he has been there for me through many challenging situations that I’ve had to deal with this year, and I’m sure I’ve served as a pillar for him in the same way. We talk nearly everyday for hours, so as you can imagine, the feelings are deep and the feelings are real. In January, he even sent me a sort of ‘care package’ with items for me to enjoy.
Now here comes the kicker – he is an open relationship right now with his girlfriend, and I would be lying if I said that this doesn’t bother me. I know the rational part of my mind says that well, you haven’t even met him (we were planning on meeting in Feb, but COVID messed things up), so why should you care? But the thing is, we have love for each other, we have stated this love for each other multiple times (I love you’s etc), we have talked about possible future scenarios etc, so this does hurt me – I would be lying if I said it didn’t. He’s been with the girl for over 8 years now, and he tells me that it isn’t a conventional girlfriend/boyfriend relationship at this point, which I believe, and that they often talk about if they should even be together anymore.
Am I being ridiculous? Am I putting too much pressure on it already? I am 26 and I am looking for partnership at this point in my life. I just need an outsider perspective, any deep interpretations or opinions would be of help. Thanks.
>I know the rational part of my mind says
That’s actually only thing missing here. He has a gf. As long you don’t mind being in a ldr as his side piece then go for it. If he claims to be in an open relationship, why not talk to her?