Dating : Dating – what it means
I’m not naive at all.
But I can’t be the only one that thinks dating someone who is dating other people is just…pretty damned gross.
If I date, I’m dating one person, and if it doesn’t work out, well hey, on to the next one.
Maybe I’m coming across as old fashioned but it couldn’t be any more unappealing that a woman is fucking other guys while I’m not with her.
Crazy, back in the day many women had multiple suitors. All of which were courting her.
Anyways, now and days, sex has nothing to do with dating or relationships. Sex is sex. It’s an entire different thing on it’s own. Some people have sex with friends and acquaintances. Some people don’t have sex with their S.O. until marriage. Some people never get married. Some people don’t have sex at all, married or not.
I view dating as merely hanging out with someone. There doesn’t have to be any intentions or ulterior motives behind it. Sometimes I have dates with my mom, kid, sisters, gf, etc. If I enjoy the company of a particular person, I go on more dates with them.
I have a gf. How did this happen? I went on dates with her many times until one day I decided I wanted to build my life and family with her.
Yeah, if I am choosing to date someone, I won’t date other people in parallel. I agree with that, it is « old fashioned », but that’s a silly label. It’s just people with different preferences.
You are coming across as old fashioned and I wish the old fashion never went out of style. Dating is fucking confusing and relentless and insane. But if you think about it this way, everything changed when women gained the ability to fuck whoever they wanted and not have kids. (birth control and modern condoms) ever since then humanity has been scrambling to rewrite all the social rules. There is no « right » or « wrong » because everyone is free to just kinda do what they want. The only thing you can do is tell girls that you’re a very monogamous person and you would like to be exclusive. See how it works for you. I prefer it that way as well, but obviously not everyone does.
I’ve always been like this too but sadly in the past 2 years of dating I’m really trying to adapt to the norm of expecting they are dating other people and assuming they can dissapear any second. It’s very hard for me to emotionally prepare myself for this shit but it’s basically you have to adapt. I wish it was still hey we got a date let’s see where this goes. Now I have to think it’s just a first date this could be the one and only time I see them. Idk how people are able to emotionally invest when there’s such a high chance of getting hurt lol.
I date around, not to have sex with multiple people, but to make sure I don’t get too attached before can see the real person – flaws and all. If someone where to ask me to be monogamous on the first date that would be a huge red flag to me, because I barely know them. You don’t truly know someone until 3 – 6 months into dating and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. The honeymoon phase will wear out 6-12 months after dating, and that’s when you really get into the personalities.
If my date told me they are just dating me and tell me that on the first date, yikes. It seems like they are settling for the one person they go on a date with and I don’t want to be with someone who settled… I don’t usually talk about it until 3 months-ish. By then, I am usually just seeing them anyways.
Dating multiple people isn’t anything new. Plus dating someone doesn’t mean you need to have sex with them before your committed.
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I think it’s the norm to only date one person. Sometimes I’d plan multiple first dates, but once it becomes a bit more serious I always go exclusive. I don’t think it is fair to the other person otherwise.