Dating : I think i’m a bit too weird for dating – teach me how to be normal!
I saw a post from someone else earlier who claims to be autistic. He’s decent looking so can get girls to come to his house from tinder to hookup or to go on a date, but it never leads to anything because they basically realise he’s a bit weird/awkward?
I’ve never really ‘dated’ as such, although I instinctively know that I would suffer the same fate as him if I WAS able to get girls from tinder etc to meet me! (which i’m not lol. Tinder has been a wash out for me. Almost no matches and the very few who do match me have seemingly no interest)
I’ve never had a formal diagnosis of autism (or anything else) although I think there’s a good chance I have some sort of mental disorder like that. I can certainly be awkward and socially anxious etc
**The irony is that i’ve hooked up with a number of girls who are complete strangers by walking up to them in bars and flirting and then taking them home.** That kind of completely goes against the idea of someone being ‘awkward’ and stuff from what i’m told..?…
But for some reason I feel that the bar environment approach much less formal? Much less »Soooo…..do you hae any brothers or sisters?? » (boring awkward convo how I imagine a date to be), to more of that nonsensical chat and flirting and dancing etc that maybe hides my awkwardness? Also, the fact we’re both drunk probably helps too!!
Even though i’ve not dated, with some of these aforementioned girls who I took home, I remember it turning super awkward in the morning once we’d both woke up. Alcohol had worn off. We’re just in a house making small talk or whatever. And suddenly it’s a bit more ‘date’ like and I feel they turn off me fairly quick and get the hell out of dodge!
What i’d really love is to watch footage of people who are ‘normal’ and watch how their dates progress. What they talk about. Just their general ‘vibe’. I don’t really have people in my life I can ask. But I read online stories where guys are like »Had another tinder date come around a minute ago. Spoke for 20 mins or so and then we had sex » and it all just reads so effortless to them and i’m so curious about how it verbally played out!!
Is anyone here in a similar situation who can relate? Or maybe they were and aren’t now? Anyone have any useful advice? Maybe you are someone who actually dates a lot and is quite ‘good’ at it? (although people say reddit is full of people like me so maybe not! lol). But on the off chance, how do your dates play out with girls 18-25 or so.
I feel like a bit of a robot asking this, but not sure of any alternatives unless I attach hidden mics and cameras to random people about to meet a tinder date!
There’s no such thing as “normal” and if you try to become something you’re not, you may very well become depressed in the process. “Normal” is what we’ve been socially conditioned to accept as commonplace. Everyone is still on varying degrees of this spectrum; some closer than others
There are weird women out there too. It’s just a matter of finding them. Ha I’m weird. You just be honest about who you are eventually you’ll find the right person for you. Sometimes it takes time.
Don’t change yourself to impress others. The best thing for you to do is to continue being you that way when someone roles along you are happy with yourself just as well as with the person you’ve found.
u wanna people dating is actually very weird.
stop dating and attend events or classes that you will meet people. U have lack of social skills, gain this first