Dating : Is this my soul bugging me or am i just too worried
So I’ve been dating someone but I’ve been pushing her away. We’d get along fine. Then when I’m alone and thinking I always have this urge to push her away.
Do I think I’m not good enough for her ? Or is my soul bugging me ? Idk. I just get so bothered inside me. She’s amazing really hard working, kind, beautiful. But IDK why I don’t feel as settled with her. I have this small drop if uneasiness within me…
Whenever I tell her we should stop, shed keep coming back and convince me that were good together. The moment we start talking again we wont stop. It’s an endless cycle. But i have tried ending things with her more than 5 times maybe…. at the same time i am scared of losing someone like her just cause of my confusion and then regret it someday… i am going crazy
Sounds like a mix of insecurity and quite honestly, maybe you just don’t want to commit to something right now.
Do yourself AND her a favor and just be 100% honest. A lot of people don’t like to deliver bad news or let someone down. I think if you tell her what’s going on in your head and that maybe you need space, she’d understand. If she doesn’t want to try understand and gets angry, then she has no business being in a relationship with you.
In the end both parties have needs. The only thing you can do is try to explain to her what’s happening.
Are you having problems with this person in the relationship ? If not then I think you’re just overthinking and feeling insecure, for reasons that you need to figure out. Maybe you need to figure it out alone and can break up with her so you can do that. Notice I didn’t call it a break because you can’t really expect anyone to sit and wait for you.. I think if you break things off clean, in ways that can’t be argued like “I’m not really happy with myself right now and therefore don’t have the mental space to keep up with this relationship right now” then it’s kind of like 1) what can she even say to that besides “I understand, do you” and 2) you were being 100% honest and don’t need to feel guilty..
But yeah 100% honesty is best. Who knows. Maybe in a few years you’ll find your way back to each other if it’s meant to be. But relationships are a really easy distraction from working on internal struggles so take the time off, take the L and work on yourself before your soul really does start to bug you. I think if you don’t do this now, things will start to happen to make you break up, like you’ll start acting different and maybe she’ll notice and start arguing with you, or like the relationship will lose its spark and then you’ll be like damn why didn’t I leave before now I’m really miserable…
It depends on why you want to push her away. Figure that out and you’ll know