Dating : It didn’t work out, but I got my closure. (people, don’t ghost!!!)

Dating : It didn’t work out, but I got my closure. (people, don’t ghost!!!)

For some background info, I (20f) met this guy (23m) on hinge (almost a month ago) & we texted everyday from the day we matched. We went on our first date after about a week and a half of texting (he lives an hour away and drove to me) and it went well & we also continued to text after that. He seemed like a very genuine & intelligent guy. I was excited that I actually met a decent guy let alone through a dating app haha. We also went on a second date this past weekend (again, he drove to me). The last few days things just felt off and he progressively started to take longer to text back. Then a day had passed and he still hadn’t replied. So that brings us to today! As I was waiting for him to reply and realized he probably wasn’t, I was struggling over whether or not I should text him anyways to ask him what happened.

I eventually texted him saying that I was confused & if everything was okay. He replied. He said that he’s been struggling with some things the past few weeks and especially in the past few days which was why he wasn’t really responding. He said he thought he was ready for a relationship but isn’t sure at this point. He said as cliche as it sounds, it had nothing to do with me but more so about the timing of everything going on in his life. Because of all of that he doesn’t want to take things further, so that neither of us get hurt. He hopes I don’t think that he’s a dick but understands if I do and wished me the best in the future.

I replied to him and told him that I understood. I told him that I still think he’s a great guy. I wished him luck on his trip abroad next month and that I hope he does well in his grad program. I said that I hope things get better for him & that I’m here for him. I ended with saying that he’s welcome to reach out if he figures things out and we could see where we both are at that point.

To be honest, I wasn’t sure if he would reply or even what to expect if he replied. I’m glad I ended up texting him and got that closure. Sure, I’m really bummed. I know we didn’t talk for that long but I did develop some feelings for him. I can’t even really be mad at him because I really appreciate him taking the time to reply and be honest. I tend to overthink and even started to wonder if it was me and maybe he was just trying to spare my feelings. However, I’ve decided to take him for his word and there’s really no point for me to dwell and hurt myself even more by spiraling/thinking negatively.

For now, I do hope that maybe it is a timing thing and that we end up getting in touch in the future because he is a great guy from what I’ve seen. However, I do feel so much more at ease and okay with the fact that it might not happen haha. I genuinely respect him for being able to maturely communicate with me about it not working out instead of not replying at all/ghosting when I asked him what was up.

Thank you for reading if you have gotten to this point. Please be kind. I just really wanted to be able to release these thoughts and let it go. Have a good day.

To clarify: we only went on two dates and only hugged to greet each other. Nothing else! He also has struggled with some things in the past (in his teens) in regards to mental health.