Dating : I’ve never been so happy for my ex

Dating : I’ve never been so happy for my ex

So I dated this guy before. He was actual trash and I was the pushover. I kept giving so much of my attention, effort and love to him. But nothing was being reciprocated. He was cold, but I loved him. Then he left me and I found out he was seeing another girl. It made me angry at first, I was hurt. I started developing a fear of relationships and love. I would always avoid seeing anything related to them, I wanted to forget that he even exists. I would always get upset and I just want to cry whenever I remember what had happened. But just a few minutes ago, I unblocked him and lurked through his account. And i’ve never been so happy seeing him all very genuine and sweet, i’ve never seen him this in love. He was saying words that I craved to hear from him. It was heart-warming, even if the words weren’t for me. Idk, i’m just so happy, he always had an image of being a cold grumpy guy in the back of my head, i thought he would never change, and even if I was a bit salty about the girl, I don’t ever want her to go through the same sht as I did. But then I realized that the reason why I wasn’t getting what I deserved, why he wasn’t treating me the way he treats her, is because I just wasn’t the person making him happy. I wasn’t the person he wanted to be all cute and romantic with. I kinda feel selfish for not letting go of him. I knew he wasn’t happy with me. But i kept forcing myself on him. But hey, i guess he’s just not the right guy for me, and i’m definitely not the right girl for him. Still refreshing to see him as a completely different guy

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  1. Wow i seriously commend you for having such a positive perspective! Sounds like you are in a healthy state of mind to think that way…which is very admirable! I hope to be as positive when my ex moves onto someone new. We are still friends so it is inevitable that both of us will move on and know about.

  2. That is really a beautiful reflection on your part. I’m glad you can embrace your selfless empathy like that, it makes you a very special person.

  3. Wow i feel like i just read over my last relationship.
    I wish I could feel happy for him but since it was so recent I just feel hurt and like i deserved to be treated so much better.
    What you said about you not being the right fit for him is true, but I also believe sometimes they learn how to treat a woman better by learning through us. Definitely sucks for me and you in this case.
    You seem like a very caring and nice person, good for you. I hope I can feel like that towards one of my ex’s some day but right now definitely do not yet, I just feel anger tbh lol.

  4. Can relate though. Went through this incredibly messy relationship and break up but stayed in touch. Years later she got married and I happy cried for her at her wedding and we’re best friends and I’m bros with her cat.

  5. Thank you a lot. This post really helped me. My gf of 3 years and I broke up last week, and we are going to live in the same house for the next 2 years due to the lease. It’s been really hard for me to reconcile this new situation and it hurt immensely. She is a wonderful human being, but we are not fit to be in a relationship. Your persepctive has helped me get closer to seeing things clearly. We still love each other, so now, I should be happy for her.

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