Dating : Men what turns you off during the early stages of texting?
After a match, people text. However sometimes it last for a day rapid fire, and then someone ghosts or loses interest.
Men specifically, since I’m a woman, what makes you lose interest in a girl through texting that makes you not want to text her after day 1?
Does it turn you off if the girl is too eager or talkative? I try to be genuine and engaging.
Only thing that bothered me enough to lose interest so far was just boring 1-2 word replies with nothing to go off of to keep the conversation going.
Short, unthoughtful replies.
That, and when I’m expected to text back every damn free moment possible.
Short answers on only answering partly
One word replies. Boring small talk.
I always minimize texting. I prefer to do most of my talking in person.
Sorry, I’m a female, but:
What turns me OFF during early days of texting is flirting. I enjoy encouragement and enthusiasm, but I prefer more stoic and upbeat messages than anything too flirty or filled with innuendo.
Why? Because no matter how much of an energetic zing it is to feel like our profiles are compatible or we have a connection, until we meet in person (or spend some proper one-on-one time together, if we met originally IRL) and even until we first kiss, I prefer NOT to be all sexual or too flirty because I might not actually feel that when i meet you or get to know you a little better. I’ve had it happen where I’ve met someone in person who i had been talking to for months (he lived across country) and the chemistry just wasn’t there for me from the instant i met him. It’s more awkward to backtrack.
Similarily, during early days of texting, i guess i keep everything on low heat because that’s what I know I can maintain long-term. I’m more interested in long-term sustainability than a high heat honeymoon period. So i am definitely open and appreciative and fun in my texts, but they are not filled with kisses and hearts and too many « i miss yous » etc etc. Though I will obviously say it if i am feeling it intensely. And my texts are limited. I hate lots of texting back and forth. I’m not playing games, it’s just *me*.
Pure sexual relationships are another story. I still keep texting to a minimum, but they are potentially scorching.
Agree with comments about short replies and partial answers. Also will add that there’s four words that will make me flush a person right then and there. They are as follows, « K », « whatever », « okie », and « chill ».
Excessive use of emojis, short replies, no initiation and boring characters
Short responses or not asking me questions about myself. If I feel like I’m the only one driving the conversation, then I’ll just stop.
Also, keep in mind that it might not have anything to do with you too. If I have already set up a few dates for a week, I might feel a bit at capacity and lay off the others I was messaging.
When I see the girl is not making as much effort as I am. Also, i don’t like it when there is too much indirect talks and not enough honesty.
Repetition of small talk and very passive shy responses, idk I find confidence in talking attractive so be real with me
Battery depleting.
I had one woman complain when I hadn’t texted her in a day. She could have just started up a conversation by saying hey, what’s up or whatever but instead asked why I hadn’t texted her. That was a red flag and I probably shouldn’t have wasted my time still going on a date with her.
I enjoy when someone shows interest even before we’ve matched so I’m glad to engage in some conversation, but I typically don’t do a lot of initiating texts before we’ve met.
One sided conversation that make it about them, short replies with little to go off of.
Had one where she kept asking for me to text back faster, as in 2-10 min intervals. I kinda did at first since it was exciting to get to know the basics. However the conversations became more passive throughout the weeks but she still insisted for me to reply faster. She also kept “teasing” me by telling me I suck, I’m a loser but also sending me cute love memes. Tbh I found it annoying after cause we hadn’t and never went out and met. It’s nice that we clicked well through text but I never took it seriously until we would’ve met irl. Apparently she did. Also she’s 18 turning 19 soon so maybe that could explain it lol
I don’t text.
Girls who text too much, I prefer to organise a date and not talk till then. Texting is boring and vapid
Short replies. Not starting or keeping any conversations going, going silent if I don’t keep texting.
Like I can tolerate literally anything if I could get a date out of it, but I will ragequit if I feel like I have to « push » you to engage in a conversation. Or if I feel like I’m texting a 10 year old.
No, getting texts from many guys is not an excuse. Don’t text me and don’t return my texts if you’re not interested. Go full-hearted into a conversation if you are.
nude pics
Please call. No really. Please. Just call.
Text messages leave so much for interpretation. Plus as a guy, I want to hear your voice, and especially if the relationship is new, get to know you.
Text messages should just be friendly good mornings, good nights, and I’m here’s.
I don’t think a woman can be « too talkative » as long as it’s a genuine, 2-way conversation.
Personally I don’t like being texted frequently during working hours. I feel pressured to constantly drop what I’m doing to respond because I don’t want her to think I’m not interested, but it’s really disruptive. A few times is fine, especially if you’re trying to make plans.
Over assuming intimacy (i.e. someone calling me dear when they have only contacted me five minutes ago), bland answers like you would give to a stranger, responding like they didn’t read a single word I
Maybe I find out she’s vegetarian or maybe she’s shallow or doesn’t seem interested or maybe I’ve found a better match.
Often just because I forgot
Short replies and never engaging in texting.
I dropped interesting Infos about myself while asking you a question. Your reaction? « haha, yes, funny. »
Come on, I know most women are lackluster in texting, but I make it easier for you to reply in a constructive way and try to engage in an interesting way of texting and not asking you how your last vacation was, how your IG influencer career is florishing, how chill we are or how nice your mirror selfi is…