Dating : Might See My Ex After 4 Years After Ghosting Her

Dating : Might See My Ex After 4 Years After Ghosting Her

To make a long story short, I’ve only been in one serious relationship in my life and that was in high school. She broke up with me on our senior year (apparently for another guy). I tried dating at the start of us doing community college, but I came back to her for practicality, and being easy to talk to (I could not get over her). Eventually, I made the decision to study at a University, but still tried to make things work. Things did not go as I hoped, she told me that she was seeing someone, and I was devastated. I felt a lot of emotions, and felt really awkward talking to her, I ghosted/blocked her.

I spent the next few years reflecting, and making stupid decisions. Until I snapped, and decided to change my life for the better. I started working out and got a decent natural form. I got a trendy haircut and maintain my beard. I went out more, and expanded my social circle. Eventually, got my degree!

Though I talked to many girls, I never had a second relationship. Currently, there is a joke among my friends that, despite my looks, I will be a 40-year-old virgin.

I recently took a second job at my old community college, ~4 years after leaving for University, as a bookstore clerk. It’s really cool passing my wisdom to new freshmen. Recently, I met up with a former classmates, who is still attending, and I joked that I might run into my ex. He said that she stills attends…

Though I was laughing with him, inside I was terrified. I’ve heard storied that she resents me, avoids me as a topic, and currently has such a great relationship, that she has forgotten about me.

Currently I feel two things,

1) Despite me improving so much, I am not happy enough with myself to show myself to her.

2) That I really hurt this girl by leaving her over her liking another guy.

To clarify, I don’t want to be with her. Looking back, we had two different goals in life.