Dating : Should I keep playing the long game or move on?
I’ll try to sum this up as Simply as possible, so I’ve been friends with this guy for the past 7 years and everyone around me has told me that I should be with him. Old bosses, family, friends and even his friends. We used to work together and have a really solid friendship and he hasn’t been scared away by any past boyfriends that have discouraged our friendship. We’ve never been romantic at all but always friendly flirty. This past year I’ve been single and have tried to get closer to him to see if something was actually there and I’ve developed feelings for him but they so far have not been reciprocated. He’s told me and others many times that his plan is to finish his masters and get married at 30 (he’s 26) but has never been in a relationship or shown actual interest in anyone. Last week while out with friends he mentioned marriage 4x during conversation and a mutual friend said you can’t get married when you don’t actually like anyone. His friends all know I’m interested and just playing it cool but I was getting a doubtful if I should keep trying or if I should just move on. I later in the day got him to myself and I finally asked what his type actually was and to my surprise he said it was me, and then immediately changed the subject. I was taken back that he finally acknowledged it but he dosent show any interest in getting into a relationship any time soon. I’m getting a little flustered with the waiting around and I just was curious if anyone else was going through or has had an experience like this and what their outcome was. Currently writing this from his couch dog sitting for him while he’s away.
TLDR: long time friends said I’m his type but dosent show signs of making a move any time soon. Do I wait till he comes around eventually?
I’m… confused as to why you say your two options are to either wait until he comes around or move on. If you like the guy, stop playing games and make the first move. I asked my own partner if he would have eventually confessed if I hadn’t first and he said no. Mind you, he never experienced rejection like most guys since he never wanted a relationship in the first place. His reasoning was that he didn’t want to mar our friendship and burden me with his feelings. So if I never took the initiative and told him how I felt for him, our relationship would have never happened and I would have never known what it is like to be loved and to love them back.
I recommend asking him out on a date and letting him know you are interested in dating him to see where your relationship goes. Be straight forward. Make sure he knows this isn’t a date between friends, but you are interested in a lovey dovey romantic sexy relationship with him.
You haven’t made ANY moves – it’s what someone would expect out of a friend. No reason to suspect you’re interested – try again.