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Dating : Afraid of putting myself out there because I’m short (27F)

Dating : Afraid of putting myself out there because I’m short (27F)


I’m a 27 year old female and I never really dated anyone in my whole life, had a couple of crushes which I sort of ran away from because I’m really afraid of putting my self out there. This is mostly because I’m really short, below-average short, I’m only 140 cm tall/short (4’7′) but otherwise completely normal-looking. Professionally I’m quite successful and confident, but when it comes to men and dating, my confidence is gone. I was thinking about trying dating apps, but I’m still a bit hesitant. Would appreciate any advice from you folks, especially if you went through something similar, because I getting really fed up with being alone.

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  1. Lots of guys like shorter girls. Most of the girls I’ve gone out with have been in the 4’11 » to about 5’4″ range…I wouldn’t turn down someone who was 4’7″ unless we weren’t a match.

  2. don’t even worry about it. This is almost a non-issue. Some men might prefer women who are not that short, but this is offset by men who prefer shorter women.

    Your overall attractiveness would be the same of someone with average height. It is just that you will be more attractive than normal to a somewhat smaller audience, and less attractive than normal to another smaller audience.

  3. Just date short guys. There’s tons of great looking shorter or even average height men that get discriminated against because of their height. That’s a huge « buffet » of great guys with arbitrarily limited options just ready for short girls.

  4. Some guys only date short girls. I personally don’t date girls over 5’2 », I am a little bit taller than average, I just find short girls more attractive. Shortness is not a bad thing for women, just men.

  5. 28F here. I think short girls are so cute and petite. I know of some really gorgeous short girls – hell if they were a bit taller it would be game over for the rest of us females LOL. But that being said, most of them are with SUPER TALL GUYS. this is just to say guys don’t care about you being a shorter-than-short female. If you got a rockin personality and warm heart, they’ll hunch over and down to kiss ya.

  6. Short chicks are hot. Stop being negative about your appearance, I have primarily dated girls shorter then me. Dudes don’t think in the ways girls do, if your bubbly and fun we see past a lot of things. We just want good vibes… So don’t let shortness stand in your way. If you have a bad attitude, then that’s a different story that requires more self reflection.

  7. I don’t see the problem. I’m a pretty short dude (5’6″). I struggled with dating due to being too short as a man but I learned eventually you just have to own it. You can’t change that about yourself so just accept it and move forward. There are plenty of awesome short guys (and tall guys) out there who would love to date you, I guarantee it.

  8. Being short for a woman is far less of a disadvantage than being average height is for a man.
    If anything it will be a net advantage because it will increase sexual dimorphism between you and men.
    Edit: there is a short female office manager at a place that I do business.
    Would be rude to ask her how tall she is but she must be around op’s height.
    I very highly doubt office manager has any difficulty whatsoever getting attention from men.
    I have limited interaction with her, but I would be surprised if she does not feel the need to pre-emptively sprinkle “my boyfriend” in speech.
    Primary cause I had to interact with her was her selling me my membership.
    That is likely the one edge case where she did not see value in mentioning a boyfriend.

    Edit 2: I was working somewhere a few days ago and a short woman asked a tall woman to reach for something on a high shelf. Maybe I am reading too much into it but to me it felt like catty insult to find a way to highlight that the tall woman was unnaturally tall.

  9. This is a non issue. I’m 6’3″ and my girlfriend is 5’2″. I’ve dated women as short as 4’10 » before. That’s a 17″ difference and most people thought it was cute. Don’t even worry about it. If you’re into tall men go for it. If you feel more comfortable with a shorter man, go for it. Whatever you do though, don’t think that just because you’re only 4’7″ that there won’t be plenty of men that will love it.

  10. Wow…I mean I would say on average most guys prefer it a shorter girl because it makes them feel bigger.

    A guy like me 5’11 loves dating girls like you because iw she’s I was 6’3 like my brother and the rest of my family. I have dated someone your exact height and we had absolutely no issues. Currently dating one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met, shes 5’0 exactly.

    If you dont want to date because you’re short, that’s a you problem, not a problem other people have when they look at you 😉

    Get out there short stack.

  11. I, 6’2″, would totally date a 4’7″ girl. It’s kind a thing for me. My point being, I’m not the only one who feels that way. Don’t worry about your height.

  12. i’m a taller dude (6’2) and 4 of my last 5 girlfriends have been under 5’2. shortest was 4’10. if i clicked with a girl her height would not matter to me – nor would it factor in to my attraction to her (she’d have to be significantly shorter than your height for me to start questioning my attraction on that basis alone).

  13. Technically you are a dwarf. It may be a problem for some people but if you look normal you should have lots of options and should try not to be afraid.

    I’m 6’3″, and years ago I dated a woman who was 4’10 ». It wasn’t the ideal physical match obviously but it was not too bad overall. If you scale that down to your size, you can imagine a fairly large pool of potential boyfriends. Some might think you’re too short but others won’t make that a huge issue.

    I wouldn’t try dating apps.

  14. Being « only » 5’8″ (on a good day) I’ve always preferred/sought shorter women. I don’t think you need to worry about what others want in a person, just put yourself out there. Good luck!

  15. The way I see it, you have a certain advantage over other women. As others here have stated, there are plenty of men who simply won’t care or will even be attracted to your slight height. Men do not enjoy this circumstance. It also means that you can date anyone of any height and society will not make fun of you for it. Tall women can really only date a small group of super tall men because that’s all that society will accept them being with.

  16. Lots of good advice in the comments. I agree with avoiding dating sites and also with the point that many guys like shorter girls. I’m 5’10” and your height would not be an issue from my perspective.

    Be yourself, be confident and put yourself out there. Share what you have to offer with the world and the right person will come around regardless of either of your heights. You’ll likely match because of personalities, hobbies, etc but you’ll never know if you remain reserved.

  17. I’m 5’10 and have dated 4’10 » but I would think 3 inches wouldn’t make a difference. For her the problem was being petite double zero. I found out after we broke up her problem was with not looking old enough and her height was part of why she looked young. She ended up changing her style and even had to alter her profession clothes.

  18. I’m 4’11 and my fiancée said one of the reasons he picked my OLD profile was because he’s only 5’7 and wanted a woman shorter than him. I’ve dated guys as tall as 6’4 and as short as 5’2. Put yourself out there and I bet you’ll get some ignorant perverted assholes but most guys won’t really care. And if they say no thanks just because of your height, then they just did you a big favor! You deserve someone to love you for you and not your height. Good luck OP!

  19. Male here (6ft) dated a girl (4ft11in) for a while. Size didn’t matter. She was cute and fun. And I liked picking her up for kisses. And she liked it when I picker her up too. Don’t be opposed to that, cause a tall guy totally will!

  20. From a man’s perspective (M23) there’s nothing to worry about.. Many men would love to be in a relationship with a short woman.. don’t get me wrong, it’s not about fetish or anything like that. It’s just, that men love to protect women and the shorter you are the more we feel like being ‘needed’. It’s weird being said, but it’s actually something natural in my opinion

    Good luck 🙂

  21. Don’t think about your height as a negative. A lot of people want a shorter partner. I have a (f) friend who is much shorter than me (I’m 5’3″) not sure exactly how tall she is but she always dates and has had long relationships with guys that are close to 6ft.
    Everyone I know has something they don’t like about themselves that makes them think people won’t want to date them. But the truth is, you won’t know until you try.
    Good luck 🙂

  22. First things first.. getting fed up with been alone could lead into rushing into something you might regret (e.g. guy who strings u along because he senses you’re lonely, manipulating etc). Not the best way to start dating right?

    You’ve got to be comfortable in yourself. No one else can ultimately do that for you (don’t tie It to partner validation).

    Been short wouldn’t be an issue. Got to own it. We’ve all got things that make us unique. I went bald in early 20s which hurt me early on but now I make fun of it now as it shows I’m confident 🙂

  23. Your height is an asset. Dating a shorter woman triggers protective tenancies and fills a need that we as men don’t get to admit exist, let alone sate.

  24. Don’t be afraid, you are not at a disadvantage. Most guys love short girls. I’m 6’5, when I was in college I dated a 5’0 girl, and it was awesome.

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