Dating : How not to get emotionally invested too soon?
I’m getting back into dating and finding it to be overwhelming, and honestly a bit stressful. I have no problem finding dates and going on them, but when I meet someone who I am really into, I get anxious, excited and ready to keep seeing them, which is fine but I am trying to remain neutral and not get too mentally invested. I don’t have a huge amount of time to see multiple people at once because I am a single Mom, and I am sure that may play a role in this. I want to be successful as possible and have fun dating, but I think maybe the romantic in me kicks on when I meet people who are my type, and it is hard to turn off. I know that a lot of people have this issue, so I figured I would ask.
So what is y’alls best advice when it comes to being care free, and not being too invested too quickly?
>what is y’alls best advice when it comes to being care free, and not being too invested too quickly?
If you imagine that they’re truly the one for you, there’s no need to rush into desparately hanging out 24/7. They’ll be around and you’ll work around each other’s schedule to make things work. Allow yourself time to get to know one another rather than « this is it » each time you meet someone. Cause if they’re the right fit, you have all the time in the world to develop your relationship.
There’s also that old saying absence makes the heart grow fonder. Give each other a little time or space to reflect and come back to one another. Set up dates a little into the future so you have something quality to look forward to rather than « wyd u up? » situations
I always see it as a « why rush? » kinda problem. If things are going great and feels right then I’ll start thinking in the long term.
Feeling needy to text? Why rush it – you’ll eventually going to see them again soon. Wanting to be together 24/7? Why rush it – they’re not going anywhere. Feeling insecure? What’s the point – they’re there with you and possibly going to spend the rest of your lives with each other.
Whenever I think of it that way, I calmed down and focus more on things that’s actually needing considerable efforts to achieve, like my business, work and studies. Of course, there’s no guarantee that this person is « the one » for you, but worrying over it won’t help – in fact it’ll just worsen your chances of staying together.
On the other side of the aisle, I’m a guy and despite my normal disdain for other humans, if I meet someone I really like I tend to let my guard down fairly quickly. My advice would be to treat each encounter as a one and done thing. After you go on a date, assume they will never text you again. If they do, great, if not, you already don’t care
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