Dating : How to not come off as « needy? »

Dating : How to not come off as « needy? »

So I matched with a girl on Hinge who is attractive and a bit of a kinkster like me. We’ve been texting on/off since 2am this morning and exchanged some verifiable pics too (including nudes). We planned something for Friday. I asked her if it was a hypothetical (an inside joke) and she replied « nope, it’s a date. » So I’m pretty excited.


Here’s my dilemma. When I’m physically attracted to a girl and I get along with her emotionally, I become somewhat.. attached. I know that sounds shallow, nevertheless that’s how I tend to get. I want to spend more time with them, I want to fuck a lot, etc. I’m pretty sure that’s what ruined my last FWB relationship. We fucked, ate and fucked, and that was it 1-2x a week. Honestly, I was looking for a little more. What I don’t want to do is that again. Especially since I’m pretty sure this girl I’m seeing Friday is not looking for anything serious.


My question is when you’re dating a guy or having a casual fling… what things might he do that comes off as needy? Desperate? Too attached? An emotional turn off?


Specifics and constructive advice would be greatly appreciated 🙂


tl;dr Going out with a girl who isn’t looking for anything serious, hoping not to screw it up by coming off as needy in the short/long term.

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What do you think?

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  1. Go in with zero expectations. There is no letdown or clingy needed if you don’t expect there to be any more than what it is in the moment.

  2. I don’t think you’re becoming clingy. What seems to be happening is you are hooking up with someone but that’s not enough. You’re looking for a relationship it sounds like and the FWBs likely aren’t.

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